suckage

I don't know what is wrong with me. I don't feel right today for some reason. Is there a change going on in me that is going to make stuff better or maybe I'm just being paranoid or something.

I know I say this every time but I just don't know to do with myself. I'm scared, scared, scared...

where is the desire to be something, someone. I feel like I am dying inside everyday. you know, it is getting to the point where I am tired of feeling sorry for myself. what good is it doing me? I don't know what else to do though. what steps should I take to get out of this rut?

I started reading some books on spirituality. I know, I sound desperate. This is something that I have been meaning to to do. I hope it makes me feel better, gives me a sense of purpose to get me out of this slump. I feel so selfish thinking only of myself all the time.